To be honest, 28 came a lot sooner then I thought it would.
I’ve spent the majority of my 20’s in Los Angeles.
I’ve raised a puppy into a dog.
And made movies.
Created a life.
Stood firm in my faith.
But sometimes, living in Los Angeles can sometimes feel a lot like living the same day over and over. (I blame the weather)
I feel like I just moved here and yet here we are at #28.
Social media provides a strange kind of mirror that reflects back to you the other possibilities that your life could have been. You can watch people you grew up with and see what their 28 looks like.
For a lot of the people I grew up with, that translates to being married and 1-3 kids deep by now.
For the few of us that moved to big cities to chase a different kind of dream, that has translated into jobs we’re moving slowly up in, rent we can’t afford, and experiences that are once in a lifetime.
But it’s through those little squares on your phone where you can scroll mindlessly that the comparison game begins. Or the what if game.
What if I had stayed? What if I stopped chasing this particular dream?
When I was a kid, 28 looked very different in my mind’s eye then reality does now that I’m standing firmly in it. As a result, my childhood ideas come popping back up. Shouldn’t I have reached the different milestones?
At 28, I’m deciding to lay those questions down and put them to rest.
I’m tired of asking myself the same question and not having a different answer.
Because the truth is, I’m exactly where I need to be.
I release the narrative that I need to be at a specific place at this point. Everyone’s life looks different. More importantly, I want my life to look different. Societal norms are starting to mean less and I’m taking more ownership.
I’m starting to have less questions and more faith.
The amazing attribute of God that I do not possess is that He has perfect timing.
Here at 28, I’ve given it over. I’ve made loose plans for what I think would be the best steps for what’s next but I have my hands open, palms to the sky. The fists my hands were balled into weren’t serving me. Holding on too tightly wasn’t opening up new opportunities but holding on to the known.
It’s in the unknown that we grow. It’s in the unknown that we discover who we really are.
So, what’s next? I really don’t know and I’m okay with that. Which is new for me and must be what 28 feels like.
So now that you know the most important lesson I’ve learned: faith > control, here are 28 other lessons I’ve learned before turning 28
28 Lessons I’ve Learned By 28
Drink more water, all the time.
Don’t wait for a partner to do what you want to do. Want to see that movie? Try that restaurant? Move to another country? Get a dog? You have everything you already need to do any of those things.
Take care of your skin. Moisturize and wear SPF.
Be willing to change your course.
Give everything over to God.
It’s okay to say no.
Kindness always wins.
Having boundaries is the best thing you can do for yourself, your relationships, your time, and your sanity.
Your mental health is important and should be taken seriously.
Buy the ticket, book the reservation, just go.
A budget is the only way you’re going to feel in control of your finances and less stressed about money.
Be conscious and aware of your choices. Turn lights off when you’re not using them, recycle, use reusable grocery bags, and educate yourself.
Learn to be alone and to love yourself.
Have grace for other people and definitely for yourself.
Help where you can and don’t feel guilty when you can’t.
If online dating isn’t for you, that’s okay
Don’t compare your first day to someone else’s 100th
Savor every moment with your loved ones. You don’t know when it will be your last with them.
Learn about your ancestry. How else will you know where you’re going if you don’t know where you’ve been?
Listen to those around you and those who have different backgrounds and experiences
Listen to your heart but then your mind. Dreams + logic = goals
You don’t have to be in a box or have a label. You can simply be you without a category.
Stop comparing to everyone else. It’s a complete waste of time.
If you’re uncomfortable, say so.
If going on an online date, always have an exit strategy
Don’t do online dating if it’s not right for you. Just because you’re a millennial, doesn’t mean it has to be.
Guacamole goes on everything.
Above all, it’s not the age or the milestone. Or what everyone else is doing. It’s not what you should be doing or should have already done. It’s where you’re at and where you’re at is exactly where you’re meant to be. God has a plan for you and it is all in His perfect timing.
I’m ready for 28 and to hold on a little less and to give freely a little more. The way I see it, the next couple of years are going to bring change and adventure and no matter what happens, I know God is by my side, guiding my steps. 2 more years left of my twenties.
Let’s do this!
Becca, this could be your best post EVER! So insightful and full of hard learned lessons. So very proud of you!!
Ashton Wikstrom says
Agreed with your mama! Love you and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Love you!! And thank you 🙂